Monday, June 12, 2006 @Monday, June 12, 2006
So its been awhile...And I guess I'm back to being my depressing self...Its just that there are some things in this life that I really find hard to comprehend and its difficult for me to share them with people I know...Mainly its because most of the people I know are the people that I've been trying so hard to help and they are mainly the people who see me as this child who knows too much for her age.
There are so many things that I know that I'll just have to figure out on my own...But why does it always have to hurt so much before I take something from it? Like when you really love someone....Most of the time...At least of me...You never realise what you've got till its gone...And once its gone its not as easy to carry on and you start regretting or you just become super angry and everything gets disrupted...But the pain just never seems to go away...Everytime you feel like everythings alright, the pain just comes back and you have to start from the beginning all over again.
And when you find someone whom you really really like,and you really wanna care for them with all you've got, the memories of what once happened comes back to haunt you and you pull back...And you never know what could have happened....And it only gets worse if the person cares just as much for you as you do for him...Because then the person might just stop caring and you'll just sit there wondering what the hell just happened....How did you manage to lose someone so important to you and how you never realised that the person really cared for you.
Its just all so confusing....