Memories like spies

The salt betrays my eyes again

I started losing sleep and gaining weight

Wishing I was 10 again

So I could be your friend again

These days we go to waste like wine

That's turned to turpentine

Till it's six a.m. and I'm all messed up

I didn't mean to waste your time

So I'll fall back in line

But I'm warning you we're growing up

I heard you found some pretty words to say

You found your little game to play

And there's no one allowed in

And just when we believed we could be great

Reality it permeates

And conquers from within again

These days we go to waste like wine

That's turned to turpentine

Till it's six a.m. and I'm all messed up

I didn't mean to waste your time

So I'll fall back in line

But I'm warning you we're growing up

I know we're okay

I know we're okay

These days we go to waste like wine

That's turned to turpentine

Till it's six a.m. and I'm all messed up

I didn't mean to waste your time

So I'll fall back in line

But I'm warning you we're growing up

That's kinda been like my favourite song of the moment. I think its cause I feel like I'm drifting from the reality that is my life. RAWR

I'm so tired of always having to be nice because everyone expects me to be there for them when the shit hits the fan.

I'm so tired of people getting mad when I'm getting happy with the way things are in my life because it doesn't benefit them in any way. So what? Its my life, shouldn't I be allowed that little bit of happiness?

I'm tired of people thinking that I'm stealing their friends just because their friends choose to include me. They were your friends first, I understand, but that doesn't mean that I'm stealing them. It just means that they're acquaintances of mine. So please, just stop thinking that I'm trying to steal your friends or whatever. I'm just hanging out with people who happen to be your friends, if at any time they don't wanna hang out with me I'll just leave you alone, whats so difficult? Why complicate something that is so easy?

Its not easy for me to still be here without being able to contact my best friend because she's got school and is getting settled in Australia. I got so used to seeing her at least once a week but now I can't because she's not here and I can' just call her to meet me downstairs when things get too overwhelming because SHE'S NOT HERE.

I miss my best friend, and despite everything that other people have done, I miss my friends. Its not easy when my friends are unavailable. Especially Claudia. She always made me genuinely smile when we were together. She'd watch me cry if that was what I needed. The best friend in the whole entire world that I could've ever asked for, isn't here. I can't reach her.

And the whole world is on your case

I could offer you a warm embrace

To make you feel my love

When the evening shadows and the stars appear

And there is no one there to dry your tears

I could hold you for a million years

To make you feel my love

I know you haven't made your mind up yet

But I would never do you wrong

I've known it from the moment that we met

No doubt in my mind where you belong

I'd go hungry I'd go black and blue

I'd go crawling down the avenue

No there's nothing that I wouldn't do

To make you feel my love

The storms are raging on the rolling seas

And on the highway of regret

Though winds of change are throwing wild and free

You ain't seen nothing like me yet

I could make you happy make your dreams come true

Nothing that I wouldn't do

Go to the ends of the earth for you

To make you feel my love

Its been almost a week since Claudia left for Aussie...I reallllllly miss my Bestie...Like yesterday I woke up thinking, "Its a Monday, what am I gonna do with Claudia today?" and then I realise....Shit! She's not here..Hope she had a good day at school yesterday though. Forgot to wish her a good day in school :(

I know my friendship with Claudia will survive anything and everything. We've been through almost everything together since we were kids, and with all the growing up the two of us did as people, we still managed to make sure our friendship grew as well. I'm thankful that she set aside time to see me once a week so that we could seize whatever little time we had left here in Singapore together before she flew off on Thursday. I always say the same thing about my friendship with Claudia because it embodies all the things I want in a healthy best friendship :D haha. She's brought a lot of smiles into my life because she's always so bubbly and she encourages me to move forward with life no matter what happens to me. She reassures me that despite whatever my circumstances, I'll make it through. Every single day of my life, I thank God for placing Claudia in my life. Someone who is always there and who always understands what I'm going through and always has words of encouragement and love and understanding.