Monday, January 22, 2007 @Monday, January 22, 2007
I wonder why I'm still holding on. Its been almost 3 months(yes, I counted the days). The days have been tough, the nights have been long. So long, and yet the tears have not ceased. I never wanted this to happen. But yet, it did. You were the one person I was willing to work through anything and everything. I guess, that wasn't enough. My heart refuses to move on, even though I know that I should. I don't even know if there's anything left for me to be waiting for. I don't know how you feel, even though I wish I knew. I don't want to ask, because I'm afraid to know the answer.
You are always the one I turn to when things go wrong. And you always make me feel better. Even now. Even when I cry about you. You still make me smile. Its not everyday that you find that the one person who causes you the most pain, is also the one who still brings you the most joy. Hahaz...Thats who you are to me. You've always been that to me. But yet, the pain is still so much stronger.
I've been down for almost a week. But yet I still have to smile. I tried to stop myself from crying today, but I couldn't.
I still love you darling. Even if you don't.