Monday, June 29, 2009 @Monday, June 29, 2009
I think that for now I'll just live my life and be happy, I keep saying it. I don't know if it'll be true, but I think that its for the best. I can feel that I already feel happier and more willing to live.
This is the way you left me
I'm not pretending
No hope, no love, no glory
No happy ending
This is the way that we loved
Like its forever
We'll live the rest of our lives
Just not together
I really wonder how true that is. Being able to love someone and loving someone and yet not being able to be with that someone. I don't know. Just seems like the way the world has always been for me. I don't regret my actions in the past. Maybe I resent my thoughts now, but eventually it'll change I guess. I hope that I'll return to the girl who could put aside her needs and wants and concentrate on others so she can help them again. Maybe thats the only thing I actually regret in my whole entire life. Turning my friends away. The realization has just hit, I'm not the good friend, I'm the toxic one. Maybe I see myself too clearly. Or rather I think I see myself too clearly.
I thank the people who always keep me grounded. My family, Claudia, Jolin, Gabe, Emman. Things wouldn't be the same if I didn't have these people in my life.